The Four-Minute Marriage Builder

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Many of us have heard of or even read the book, “The One Minute Manager.” This book gave us great insights into being the leader/manager in one-minute segments. It was meant to inspire us to be healthier leaders in the workplace. Being a leader in the workplace is admirable, but is it possible to make our marriages healthier?

My wife was recently listening to the radio when she heard  a similar concept to the one-minute manage called,  the four-minute marriage builder.

You see I had come in the door the other day, having had one of those days, when she stopped me with these words.

“Did you know that the first four minutes a husband and wife connect after being away sets the mood for the rest of the evening?”

Apparently, taking the first four minutes with your spouse is crucial to building better relationships.

What would you do with your first four minutes? Here’s a few ideas…

  • A four-minute hug.
  • Say, “I Love You” in  five different languages.
  • Sit on the couch, porch or patio and ask about each other’s day.
  • Grab hold of your spouse, look them in the eye and tell them three beautiful things about them.
  • Dance.   Couple Dancing
  • Ask what was the best thing that happened, most surprising thing that happened, and most common thing that happened today .
  • Sit your spouse down and give them a foot rub.
  • Kiss.
  • Tell your spouse one thing you enjoy about him/her.
  • Give your spouse a nice four-minute back rub.

Well there you have it. Take four minutes before you do anything else. This sets the tone for the evening and quite possibly for the next several years.

Have a great week…or should I say, a wonderful four minutes!

What are some other creative ways you can express your love in the first four minutes?


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